Okay, so here’s the thing… 2008 was a crappie year. I am so happy that it is ending. Oh there are wonderful things to celebrate, but by and large the year was a bust from my perspective.
The year ending means yet another New Year’s Eve, alone, with no one special to kiss.
Oh don’t get me wrong, I will once again celebrate the passing of this disastrous year by having dinner with my two best friends, I wouldn’t have it any other way. They are the only way I get through these dark moments. But it isn’t the same.
I was chatting with a friend online today, to maybe snag myself someone to meet for a drink, come to find out he’s dating someone. I just don’t know what I do wrong. Yeah back here tonight. Sorry. But I am going to try and not dwell there.
I think what bothers me more is that I don’t understand why in my world NYE is worse to face than Valentine’s Day or any other “couples” holiday. Maybe it is because I have shared a Valentine’s Day with a man, but never a NYE. Maybe it’s because NYE represents a new beginning, and mine keep beginning alone.
It’s funny, all the stuff about proposition 8, and all the weddings over the past summer didn’t bother me, as much as December 31 does. And yet there is no way to change it. I must summon my courage, put on my Brave Little Toaster face and get through another year alone. But some year, I am going to wake up on January 1 and my Prince Charming will be there, next to me… hair tousled, and all sleepy eyed… and I will be in heaven.
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